Gosh. I remember the first time someone said that to me.
It's not just about you!
I'd never heard that phrase before and I reeled in reaction to someone saying that to me. It was meant as a snarky tease but it felt like a blow. Freaked me right out. (Do I really think that it's all about me? Yikes!)
It's true, though.
Especially if you are an entrepreneur, healer or teacher or in any service profession. The fact is that you are serving others. What you do is critical. Especially for your fellow humans at this moment in time.
You are serving humanity. You are serving the earth. You are serving our collective evolution.
In case you haven't noticed, we are in desperate need of your help.
This is the time. You are making a difference. You are moving people forward.
I challenge you to double down on the positive work you’re doing. You are in a position to help people. Get out there and do even more good.
Heal yourself to help heal others.
The best thing to do is nothing.
You're natural tendency is to act. Distract. Do something! Say something.
But honestly, when you don't know what to do next...
Sit tight. Stay in bed if you have to. Stop. Sit. Breathe.
Whatever it takes when you don't know what to do next, don't do anything.
That's the ruling, experienced wisdom. Take heed. Follow it.
Tomorrow is another day.
If you've ever been in therapy or to a doctor for addiction or read certain sorts of books on addiction you have inevitably run into the question, so, "What are your triggers?"
What are not my triggers might be the better question. I'm not going to list any possible triggers here because I know that just by listing them, I may trigger you.
So, recently, I realized that anger is a big trigger for me. I mean out of the blue, totally unexpected, Irish me all up anger that rose up without me ever having a chance to consider how I might contend with it.
Anger as trigger is no surprise. In the program, it's one of a standard formula of four. H.A.L.T. Hungry/Angry/Lonely/Tired.
But what do you do about it when it comes on you like gangbusters without warning or a chance to catch your breath?
Whatever suggestions you have, please list them in the comments below.
All I have for my part is to get through 40 days of sobriety. Then three months. Then six clean and so forth.
The longer you are sober, the easier it will become to overcome those sudden flashes of anger, rage. It's a practice.
In the meanwhile, check in here. Check in anywhere you can find support before you reach for a drink.
BREATHE. That's a good practice. Lay down. Whatever you can do short of picking up a drink. Do that.
Dealing with triggers and anger on your own terms rather than going unconscious is a practice and a process.
We all have to contend with this. All of us. It's easier to be with friends who understand. Find them here or find them somewhere.
We need each other.
The time is always right to do what's right.
— Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
There's a funny thing about doing the right thing.
Doing implies action.
Sometimes, oftentimes really, doing the right thing requires that we refrain from doing.
Especially when it comes to recovering from addiction.
Whether we are addicted to alcohol, food, anger, negative thoughts, and so on and so forth... the right action is refraining from action.
There's still the same impulse for action happening up front. Act! Speak! Do!
But before action or refraining comes envisioning, clarity, intention, decision, commitment.
Refraining from action is more difficult, more challenging than action. You need space. You need space and time for all the aforesaid considerations. Just a second but definitely at least a second.
That's where some sort of meditation or mindfulness or breathing practice comes in. That's where ongoing sobriety really helps. A lot.
It's a matter of time. And if you can't get into anything else. Get into the present moment. Whatever you may be feeling or wanting to do. If you can snap yourself into the present moment long enough to check in with another person about what (destructive) action you may have the impulse to take, you may buy yourself enough time to snap yourself out of taking action you would be better off refraining from.
Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Be happy now. Don't wait for something outside of yourself to make you happy in the future. Think how really precious is the time you have to spend, whether it's at work or with your family. Every minute should be enjoyed and savored.
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